The Show Must Go On

   This post is different from all of my previous posts. I have been struggling the past few weeks with sewing withdrawal, and adjusting physically to a new job (cashier at a grocery store.) It has been a difficult time for me, and the things that have pulled me through this are gratitude lists and perseverance. I seldom air my dirty laundry. Describing my difficulties and sadness is way too vulnerable for my comfort. I am usually a happy camper, and even when I'm not, I fake it till I make it. Well, screw that.

   Some other writers have been honest about their struggles, and I found it helpful to find out that what I am experiencing is bona fide. I am not crazy. By that I mean, it is not just pretend. I am validating my own experience, since I have not shared this publicly, so how could anyone else validate it???

   Being too tired to sew makes me sad. This is not depression, this is SAD.  Being tired narrows down my peripheral vision (a borrowed phrase that fits.) It is hard to see the end of the tunnel.  Learning new job skills is tough for this old dog. And standing on my feet for a long work day is the hardest part. Good shoes help a lot, but they don't turn a 59 year old into a spring chicken. I know it will get easier as I get in shape. And then I'll have the energy to sew, and then I'll be over my sadness.

The gratitude list is mainly about having a job and therefore having money for my expenses. Car insurance and license tabs are due this month. Check!!

My 1998 Chevy Blazer. Perfect for navigating mountain roads.

Getting my Husqvarna Viking Sewing Machine serviced is overdue. Check!! It messed up July 9th. That was 35 long days ago. Here's my facebook rant: " If you can't decide whether to shoot your sewing machine or yourself, and you have tried cleaning, rethreading, different thread, different bobbin, new needle, cussing, prayer, tears, and repeat, try reinserting the needle one. more. time. "  The underside thread kept bunching up, and even vacuuming the machine only helped for a few minutes. There are lots of helpful sites on the internet, and yes, I looked at them ALL. A good one is on Sew4home.  My favorite repair advice was to floss the tension discs with dental floss. Didn't help. 

   I called a couple of repair shops to see if I could try anything else at home, aka take another run at the wall, or whether I was smart to admit defeat. The first shop, which did not earn my business, told me to "bring your little punkin' in and we'll fix it right up. It will probably take a couple of hours and cost over $200," The second shop gave me several likely causes. (the take up lever needs adjusting, lint in the tension discs, or a scratch in the bobbin case) Each are easy shop fixes but which I can't do at home, in fact, the machine probably just needs to be serviced, to the tune of $69. I appreciate sew much this shop's willingness to discuss possible issues. Thank Goodness. I can admit defeat.

Know when to surrender, Dorothy.

   Last week I saw a sign at the grocery store for sewing machine repair. The gal takes the machines to Boise at no charge (150  miles away) and the repair place is an established business; cost: $69. I took my machine to her today and will have it back next week. Being able to pay for this and getting it done is on the top of my gratitude list.

I do have my mom's Singer Featherweight. Old Faithful. Without it, I would probably have had to shoot myself. Must. Sew. This may sound like whining to a non-sewist. But, I am spoiled for my nice fancy Viking, and the show must go on. 

I have a goal this month to sew nursery decor for Brandee, the recipient of the baby quilt in June's post. So far I have managed to sew the changing table cover. 

The zebra panel is fabric made in Tanzania.

The bumper pads and dust ruffle will match, and coordinate with the jungle baby theme, and the baby quilt.  I will share photos by the end of this month. Just in time for baby Kelton, who is due in September.